Sleep Deprived Hallucination

It's 4 O'Clock in the morning,
On the east coast, of the western part of the world,
...and if you're where I'm at you're sleeping,
Unless you're on the other side, then you may be creeping,
So you may see this, but alas
I don't know you, and you don't know,
But I'm writing you this poem,
I'd imagine you'll smile when you read it,
Well I'm writing, it isn't well thought out,
But neither is love, and this is what's it about,
It's quite random, you see,
If you find this you may find me,
I'll post it all over the net, with mistakes you BET,
And I'll hate it, after
And if you don't love it, may it bring you laughter,
Cause I LOVE you,
Whoever you may be.

Letters to a Princess

Dear Princess Celestia, today I learned that my friends are like precious resources, those who patients I cannot wear thin will turn into beautiful diamonds, those friends will always be there for you, unconditionally. And the other group of people will be when everything is falling around them so you can rebuild them, and will be by you when you are falling to throw salt in your wounds. So today ...I masted smiling at it all. I annoy my friends and neighbors, my friends laugh, giggle and throw jabs. My neighbors move and make snarky remarks to others. My friends are true, and everything else is false. I want you to understand something, you will not understand me. My friends will understand that, my friends will grasp that. I don't care what my neighbors do. My reality is very very warped. But I've learned more in these little instances in which I replay the (little) moments so I can process them better. (Whether or not it may take a day.) And I know I'm the looniest, zaniest, spontaneous, sporadic pony in the realm so I thank them for being understanding of at least that. Any way I'm off to have more adventures and learn many more things. Until next time.....

Before They Carry me Away

I'm writing this post and using my full name. I Maurice Lamont Brown II am using lots of my unfinished ideas to put in my portfolio for my Creative Writing class at Daemen. The class CMP 347 the professor is the well known Peter Siedlecki.

Case 19

Make my house your inn,
Not your residents.

Words spoken by,
A man much older,
And much wiser than I.

I wanted to ask him,
Ask him many questions,
But alas I didn't see him again.

I should of heeded his warning,
And maybe this would be,
....different,
Very different,
But this is like everything else
A monument to my failures.

Nevertheless I press on,

Onto her,

For the sake of privacy,

I'll assign her a number, 19.

That's when I met her,

Age 19, figure is something else,

Herself esteem was low,

Her pride was high,

Sadly I wasn't.

Maybe if I was,

This would be different,

....... very different.

We dated,

We fell in love,

Days turns to weeks,

Weeks turns to months,

But not months to years.

A year later I hear those words,

"Make my house your inn,
Not your residents."

It was too late,

The questions I wanted to ask are simple.

What to do if you let someone in?

Someone who you can't live without?

A person with the power to destroy,

Every wall you built?

He probably couldn't answer me.

I let my guard down,

I fell for the dream,

19 really did a number on me.

I became a monster,

Lashing out at everything,

Falling back into depression,

19 fucked me up,

I couldn't help but smile,

And would reject all help,

All outside compassion.

I hated what I've become,

I'm the asshole you see today,

I hide behind bass kicks,

And very vicious lyrics,

Headphones always on.

I drink and smoke,

Unlike the dapper Mr. Smith,

Straight-edge isn't my scene,

And I'm still in that arms race,

Still raging against the machines.

Stacking false smiles,

On falser emotions,

To keep the falsest people happy,

I do not know,

Which life I'm living,

Or if I'm alive,

If this is a bad dream,

Please end it now.

All the thoughts in my head,

Said die now,

But alas I am afraid,

Of death and many other things,

Like cats, I'll never show it,

Or admit it outside of this form.

If you are unfortunate enough to read this,

I truly am sorry,

This is the only way I release anymore,

Its healthy, and more additive,

Again I use sadly,

......but sadly this is all I have left, that isn't designed to melt faces.

DJ Bonaparte

https://www.facebook.com/DJBonaparte1
That link is to my DJ page on facebook. Shoot me a like or for the broines with Ponyhoof app give me a brohoof. Alright thanks.



Things are looking up

Mind of Bonaparte

The world is definitely going dark again. Writing about suicide and homicide again. I'm starting as always to miss home, but truthfully if you won't judge me on it (Kristal) I don't want to go back. At least not now, if I'm feeling shitty in the middle of nowhere, I don't want to be shitty at home. I'm really good at this right now, nobody up here is aware of anything. Or maybe they don't care, either way the facade is paints a pretty picture. I get to be the asshole that I can't be at home. I'm free to say whatever out of my mouth, it's liberating. If only someone up here understood. Well there is two people that get me. A girl by the name of Kate, but she only understands me when I'm drunk. That isn't healthy. The other is Ezada, but she has her own issues, like not realizing she is a real person and can do much better than what she is doing. I'll no longer speak on it. I wish Charles didn't quit, but it was right for him.

I'm off to go mentally cut myself. On my paper cut shit again thank "God" for iPods.

~Truly yours, Hopeless Romantic 12435

Back to the Haze

So I've just been locked out of one of my favorite blogs. Damn that CH what did I do to you? But alas it's time to get back to what I do best. Back to the poetry, Poetry to the music. And it starts with a new post this week. You ready for it?

Taking Chances

Because of Twitter, I posted a poem to my Facebook page and I'm probably going to be sending out a few emails. I hope it all works out in the end. If it doesn't oh well.

Drug of Choice

My life is a train/On a reckless collision course

I drink so much liquor/That my throat is coarse

Pills are like pokemon/I just gotta catch’em all

Even when I’m praying/In a bathroom stall

I get so high/That on occasion/I might die

I do it for days on in

I’m losing friends/They say they don’t see me anymore

I’m always home/And when I’m not

I swear I’ll quit/But I never get enough of it

My hands are shaky/I think I’m going through withdrawal

I haven’t done this much/Since the last time/This fall

I’m at my peak/So why is this valley/So cold

I’m on a roll/Literally I don’t know/When to fold

I had it all/And soon it/Will all be gone

It’s all my fault/At least that is/What I keep telling myself

I’m so lost/My highs/Are all new lows

No matter what/I can’t stop/Doing it/NO!!!

What would you do/If this was all you had

Pack it up/If it makes you feel so bad

But me I love it

Using a new format/Makes me feel so bold/Forget the comma/ It’s just too old

It’s so unhealthy /This crazy obsession

I’m losing sleep/ Slowly slipping into depression

My condition is regressing/You have no idea

I need help/Accepting some is my fear

This isn’t just a lifestyle choice

It’s become my existence/Sorta an addiction

Without it/I just couldn’t survive/I need it

You just wouldn’t understand

This is my passion/This is my calling

I exchange one for another

They are the same

Music & Writing/Writing & Music

My drugs of choice

SOPA Blackout

Tell them that we mean business.

https://www.google.com/landing/takeaction/

This is a stance against the injustice that the Government is imposing on us, let them know we won't allow it.